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Dust Raven

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A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer were all asked to find the volume of a Red Rubber Ball.

 

The mathematician took a string and measured the ball's circumference. From that he was able to calculate the radius, and then the volume.

 

The physicist submersed it in a graduated cylinder full of water and measured the difference in volume.

 

The engineer said, "Let me just look that up in my Red Rubber Ball book."

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The leaders of the big beer companies meet for a drink. The president of Budweiser orders a Bud, the CEO of Miller gets a Miller, the head of Coors orders a Coors, and so on. Until it's the Guinness CEO's turn. He orders a Pepsi.
"Why didn't you order a Guinness?" everyone asks.


He replies, "if you guys aren't having beer, then neither will I."

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So, Rene Descartes is in a bar near closing time. The bartender asks him, "Would you like another drink?" Descartes replies, "I think not" and vanishes. After Descartes disappears, the bartender turns to Heisenberg. "Wow, did you see that?" the bartender asks, to which Heisenberg replies, "Possibly, but I can't be sure."

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Albert Einstein, Blaise Pascal, and Isaac Newton were playing hide-and-seek. Einstein counted to twenty and Pascal ran off, but Newton just drew a square in the ground around himself with a stick. Einstein turned around, saw Newton, and said, "I've found you!" Newton looked confused. "No," he said, "You've found one Newton per square meter. You've found Pascal!"

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A snail was making his way through the rough part of town when he accidentally turned down a dark alley, where he was mugged by two turtles.

 

When he met with the police later on, they asked him, "Exactly what happened in there?"

 

"I don't know, Officer," the snail replied. "It all happened so fast."

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3 hours ago, Pariah said:

A snail was making his way through the rough part of town when he accidentally turned down a dark alley, where he was mugged by two turtles.

 

When he met with the police later on, they asked him, "Exactly what happened in there?"

 

"I don't know, Officer," the snail replied. "It all happened so fast."

 

Raphael & Michelangelo have a LOT of explaining to do when I tell Splinter. 

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