What Is the Worst Movie You've Ever Seen?

[Pariah]

Over in the Funny Pics II Thread there was a bit about Gary Larson realizing that Ishtar wasn't as bad as the comic strip he'd written made it out to be. You may have seen it (the thread, not Ishtar).

 

So if Ishtar isn't the worst movie, then what is?

[Pariah]

As a replacement, I would like to nominate the 2007 Diane Keaton / Mandy Moore movie Because I Said So, whose title I can only assume arose in response to the question, "Why should we make this hideous movie at all?"

[Starlord]

Hard to say because the REALLY, REALLY awful movies I don't finish.

 

Off the top of my head, The Last Jedi was VERY bad combined with utterly painful because I care about the franchise.  Plus I had to finish because I needed to see what happens.  So The Last Jedi.

[Christopher R Taylor]

The Dark Backward.  Literally the most awful thing I have ever witnessed on film.  Its so bad they had to be doing it on purpose.

[Logan D. Hurricanes]

Van Helsing was so bad it made me angry. So that's my first instinct. 

 

But then I remember The Runaway Bride which I only saw because my wife insisted. Yeah, that was worse. 

[death tribble]

I have seen some dreadful films, ones that have won Golden Raspberries and ones that have won Golden Turkeys.

Godzilla vs the Smog Monster is pretty bad. And Plan 9 From Outer Space is bad. This is the standard that I measure bad films. I can watch and rewatch the Star Wars prequels (Phantom Menace at al) and sequels (Force Awakens et al) so I do not count any of these as bad.

There is only one film that I went to see at the cinema that I came close to working out on. That was Hook. Take everything you know and love about Peter Pan and take a dump on it. A low point for Robin Williams and Dustin Hoffman although that latter comes off worst. The whole thing with the Lost Boys was lamentable. Trying to make them more American. Trash.

[Bazza]

8 minutes ago, death tribble said:

 

There is only one film that I went to see at the cinema that I came close to working out on. That was Hook. Take everything you know and love about Peter Pan and take a dump on it. A low point for Robin Williams and Dustin Hoffman although that latter comes off worst. The whole thing with the Lost Boys was lamentable. Trying to make them more American. Trash.

BLASPHEMY !

PERSECUTE !

KILL THE HERETIC !

[death tribble]

That was just a cheap jibe and is beneath you.

Do you seriously like Hook ?

[Tjack]

  Coldly......Green Hornet......Seth Rogan must die!

[Logan D. Hurricanes]

Not including Plan 9 or Manos: Hands of Fate because I've only seen them riffed on MST3K and I love them. I imagine if I paid to see them in the theater I would feel differently.

 

Troll 2 is objectively the worst movie I have ever seen unriffed, but I only saw it because I heard it was so bad and I was curious, so that doesn't really count either.

 

If we include MST3K movies, then Red Zone Cuba is the worst. So bad, I can't even finish it, even when it is riffed. 

[death tribble]

15 minutes ago, Tjack said:

  Coldly......Green Hornet......Seth Rogan must die!

Having seen the Green Hornet in the Adam West Batman series and then a black and white serial from the 1940s I can see why. It ain't good but there are far worse out there in my far from humble opinion.

[Old Man]

So many to choose from.  The Last Jedi is up there for SF/F, but Prometheus probably beats it--at least TLJ had some interesting visuals.

 

I'm going to give the title to Sex and the City 2, however.  It wasn't just bad, it was actually offensive, on multiple levels.  South Park offensive, but unintentionally and without humor.

[death tribble]

I get the hatred for Prometheus, Alien Covenant and even Alien 3 and Alien Resurrection but the production is good and the story line(s) make sense.

 

I have not seen Sex and the City either the TV series or the films but I have heard how bad they are. It is like the Twilight Saga. you don't need to see it to know it is bad.

 

I have seen extracts from Troll 2. Particularly with the bad lines being quoted.

 

I have to admit I gave Star Trek 5 a pass because it is the old crew and I like Star Trek the original series. The story is poor and I got the feeling that Shatner may have been trying to settle scores with some of the cast.

[slikmar]

I would rank Prometheus and Green Hornet as they did above.

Funnily, my first thought on seeing this thread was it probably can't be long enough for Spence to chime in. LOL

[Joe Walsh]

The worst movie I ever watched all the way through was Disney's Moon Pilot.

 

At the time, we were trying to watch every Disney movie ever made, so despite its awfulness, we didn't switch it off. And this was after making it through tons of execrable 60s/70s Disney live-action garbage. Most had at least one tiny bit that we enjoyed. Not Moon Pilot. It's just awful.

 

[Cygnia]

The Uma Thurman/Ralph Fiennes version of "The Avengers"

[archer]

1 hour ago, Starlord said:

Hard to say because the REALLY, REALLY awful movies I don't finish.

 

Off the top of my head, The Last Jedi was VERY bad combined with utterly painful because I care about the franchise.  Plus I had to finish because I needed to see what happens.  So The Last Jedi.

 

 

Yeah, there's a lot of movies which are deliberately bad. Or which have tiny budgets and can't accomplish whatever they wanted to accomplish based on the money available.

 

But The Last Jedi was just bad. And not in a way which had anything to do with not being able to afford good actors, good writers, good directors, or good special effects.

 

It violated the universe's own rules about how the universe worked multiple times. And not only that but made those violations into major plot points. And not just how the Force works but also how hyperdrive works because apparently you can no longer go faster than light to get ahead of a starship you're very, very slowly chasing across realspace.

 

It made no sense, objectively.

 

The military leaders on both sides of the fight have less of an idea of how a military conflict should happen than 5 year olds playing with plastic soldiers.

 

It stole scenes from the previous Star Wars movie as if the writer was too lazy to come up with new scenes.

[death tribble]

42 minutes ago, Cygnia said:

The Uma Thurman/Ralph Fiennes version of "The Avengers"

Granted. If you are a fan of the Diana Rigg and Patrick Macnee era then it has a lot to live up to. Again I give it a pass due to Sean Connery and the dressing up as bears harkened back to Avengers episodes.

[Lord Liaden]

2 hours ago, Logan.1179 said:

Van Helsing was so bad it made me angry. So that's my first instinct. 

 

Of all the movies I went to a theater to see, that was the only one I ever walked out of before it finished. I was just bored by it. It was so unrelievedly hyperkinetic that all the action and spectacle blurred into one long sound and fury, signifying nothing.

[Old Man]

Just now, Lord Liaden said:

 

Of all the movies I went to a theater to see, that was the only one I ever walked out of before it finished. I was just bored by it. It was so unrelievedly hyperkinetic that all the action and spectacle blurred into one long sound and fury, signifying nothing.

 

That was one of the movies where the cast and director figured out what kind of movie they were making about a third of the way in and just went totally over the top.  Kind of like the Kevin Costner version of Robin Hood where Costner's English accent disappeared halfway through, and Slater's accent should have.

 

Van Helsing was memorable to me because it was the first time I'd seen a boom mike accidentally appear in a big budget Hollywood film.  Though that might have been on the projectionist.

[dmjalund]

Gigli (Ben Affleck, Jennifer Lopez) is supposed to be pretty bad. Haven;t watched it though

 

 

 

 

[THE SITE MERGED THESE EVEN THOUGH THEY ARE OF DIFFERENT TOPICS]

 

 

 

 

 

My BIG Problem with The Last Jedi, is that the director forgot that the main job of a Start Wars movie is to ENTERTAIN, not hit people over the head with a morale message. especially not to sacrifice the rep of a well liked character from the previous movie to make your point about toxic masculinity.

 

The other two sequels had their (many) flaws but at least the director didn't forget this

[Certified]

As someone who's watched a lot of bad movies, there are some that rise to the top. (Going to try and avoid obvious options like Plan 9, or anything Troma, as they are in the so bad, they're good category, and things like Highlander II because everyone knows this flick. Also, to make it fun, let's make sure there is at least one major name tied to the film. Finally, I'm omitting Pluto Nash as my brother likes it.) There was one about a kid who finds out he's a werewolf while in high school, that was just terrible. 

 

There was an epic spy thriller that involved a secret agent trying to take down an evil vegan before she could make the world healthy or something. 

 

 

Let's see if I can do something a bit more controversial ... 

 

This last movie is about a man who lies to his family, cheats to get ahead, and nothing bad happens to him. 

 

 

Okay, in fairness it's only controversial because the man in question is Mr. Mom. 

 

[slikmar]

32 minutes ago, dmjalund said:

Gigli (Ben Affleck, Jennifer Lopez) is supposed to be pretty bad. Haven;t watched it though

 

 

 

 

[THE SITE MERGED THESE EVEN THOUGH THEY ARE OF DIFFERENT TOPICS]

 

 

 

 

 

My BIG Problem with The Last Jedi, is that the director forgot that the main job of a Start Wars movie is to ENTERTAIN, not hit people over the head with a morale message. especially not to sacrifice the rep of a well liked character from the previous movie to make your point about toxic masculinity.

 

The other two sequels had their (many) flaws but at least the director didn't forget this

The problem with Last Jedi is the person in charge of the movie disliked everything that made Star Wars what it was and so intentionally went in and deconstructed every single piece they could. Honestly, I know some people who are part of the big Cosplay groups (Mandalorians and 501st Battalion) who chat with the various people behind the scenes and literally, the director went in specifically to undo everything done in the previous movie. Like Abrams or not, he had a plan for the 3 movies and really loved the series, hence his sort of turning his Star Trek reboot (which I like) into something closer to Star Wars.

The only reason I didn't put the Costner Robin Hood on here is because of Rickman's sheriff - he was fantastic.

[fdw3773]

Batman and Robin in 1997 that featured George Clooney as Batman quickly comes to mind for this topic. The portrayals by Chris O'Donnell as Robin, Uma Thurman as Poison Ivy, Arnold Schwarzenegger as Mr. Freeze, and Alicia Silverstone as Batgirl just added to the silly campiness and mediocre story-telling.

 

Clooney to his credit would later admit that it was a bad film overall. It wouldn't be until 2005 when the Batman film franchise restarted featuring Christian Bale.

[Tjack]

2 hours ago, death tribble said:

Having seen the Green Hornet in the Adam West Batman series and then a black and white serial from the 1940s I can see why. It ain't good but there are far worse out there in my far from humble opinion.

   Trust me my dear Tribble, you don’t want to crack the lid on this particular can of crazy.