Vulcan Posted August 9, 2008 Report Share Posted August 9, 2008 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Sounds like Hetai Heros. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bloodstone Posted August 9, 2008 Report Share Posted August 9, 2008 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... LOL! No... a lot of the more perverted sounding quotes are actually pretty innocent, but sound rather naughty out of context. The hard to make it with your own mouth quote, for example, was just about a comment about a sound effect. The hand job comment was the characters reaction to being caught in a Hands of Stone style entangle. Which is not to say that we don't joke around about mature topics a lot, cause we do... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Major Tom Posted August 9, 2008 Report Share Posted August 9, 2008 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Sounds like Hetai Heros. Don't you mean Hentai Heroes? Anyway, it's either that or "It's Always Sunny in Ninja HERO". Major Tom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Balabanto Posted August 9, 2008 Report Share Posted August 9, 2008 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... The heroes are fighting a team of chinese superheroes in the South American jungle: Nightingale: And who are you, Windbreaker? Cloud Queen: I am Cloud Queen, Mistress of the Four Winds Nightingale: Well, Wind Witch is taken, so I guess Cloud Queen is number two. Coatlcan: I guess it's better than Subdural Hematoma Woman Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egyptoid Posted August 9, 2008 Report Share Posted August 9, 2008 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Marvel Galaxies Campaign: Starfox, the ladies man, is ambushed by 2 Skrulls, and a Super-Skrull. they had infiltrated the base, and laid wait in the men's room. the 2 regular Skrulls posed as sinks, and the Super-Skrull posed as a vending machine, the kind that has combs, aspirin, hankies, etc. they totally caught Starfox by surprise and proceeded to beat the snot out of him. as he lost consciousness, the last thing he mumbled was: "I wondered why that vending machine didn't have any hair gel in it" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlackCobra Posted August 9, 2008 Report Share Posted August 9, 2008 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Quote from another of our Fantasy games. PC is explaining the current situation to a halfling we found near-dead in the midst of a half-orc camp (post fight with the same half-orcs): PC #1: "I'm sorry, but your companions are all dead---" PC #2, interrupting: "No, no! First, you say 'Your adventuring companions are up on the roof...'" For those of you who don't get the reference, this is a reference to a very old joke, reprinted here for your edification: "A fellow is going away for a vacation for a couple of weeks and he has his best friend look after his house. And water the plants, take care of the pets and all the rest of it. He’s gone for a couple of days and he gets a phone call from the fellow tending to the house. He says, “I gotta tell you, I’ve got bad news – your cat’s dead.” The guy was traumatized. So the next year when he was getting ready to go on vacation he says, “I’m going to be going again. I want you to watch the house --- and look after things. But if anything happens, you’ve go to give it to me in small installments – so I can absorb it. Like with the cat – you call me up and, Bingo! You say, “Your cat’s dead!” Instead, you should have said, “Your cat went up on the roof.” Then, call me back later and said, “And, the fire department came to rescue your cat.” And then you can say, “And then the cat fell off the roof.” And then, you could have called me and said, “Your cat’s dead”. That way I could have prepared myself rather than being so shocked. The guy said, “Okay. I’ll do that. Probably nuthin is goin ta happen anyway. I understand.” So he goes on vacation for a couple of days; he’s only on vacation for a couple of days and he picks up the phone and it’s his friend who’s looking after the house, and the fella says, “I’ve got news for you. Your mother’s on the roof.” Reprinted via the internet from this fine website: http://facets-aquamarine.blogspot.com/2007/02/joke-cat-is-on-roof.html Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maelstrom Posted August 10, 2008 Report Share Posted August 10, 2008 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From today's game: Pulp characters confronted with a food replicator. KotA: "I order burger, fries, and a Coke." GM: "The burger and fries are ok, but the coke tastes like RC." KotA: "I thought you said they had ADVANCED TECH!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matt Frisbee Posted August 10, 2008 Report Share Posted August 10, 2008 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From today's game: Pulp characters confronted with a food replicator. KotA: "I order burger, fries, and a Coke." GM: "The burger and fries are ok, but the coke tastes like RC." KotA: "I thought you said they had ADVANCED TECH!" Me and my R-C! Me and my R-C! 'Cause what's good enough for other folks, Ain't good enough for me and my R-C! Me and my R-C!... Matt "Royal Crown Cola really rocked when it was made with real cane sugar instead of Fructose -- and was bottled in glass instead of plastic" Frisbee P.S. Yeah, hopelessly retro taste buds. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maelstrom Posted August 10, 2008 Report Share Posted August 10, 2008 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Dang, I don't remember back that far anymore. I remember RC being good once upon a time, but as I get older, "sweet" isn't that attractive to me anymore. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maelstrom Posted August 10, 2008 Report Share Posted August 10, 2008 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Also from my game today: "Next time, buy a fireproof cat." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnotherSkip Posted August 10, 2008 Report Share Posted August 10, 2008 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Caliph: Attack me with a rutabaga and I become totally incontinent. So instead of fingerprint dust he used powdered sugar on the water dispenser? Now the water dispenser tastes good? (Echo trying to explain a failure by 8 on a criminology roll….. ) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Susano Posted August 10, 2008 Report Share Posted August 10, 2008 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Session 17.5 of Vendetta Rhapsody Ghost Walker (OOC): "Oh heck, I'm going to this my way." GM: "Your way?" Koyotie (OOC): "He's going to hit [his opponent] in the head with a rock." Ghost Walker: "Death is rather permanent. The grave has only made two exceptions: me and Jesus, and I'm not the nice guy." Mary Tower (Koyotie's SID) explains how she grew her hair back after it was supposedly shaved off: "Secret Indian hair-growing dance. If I do it in reverse all of the buffalo will come back." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Obvious Posted August 11, 2008 Report Share Posted August 11, 2008 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Me and my R-C! Me and my R-C! 'Cause what's good enough for other folks, Ain't good enough for me and my R-C! Me and my R-C!... Matt "Royal Crown Cola really rocked when it was made with real cane sugar instead of Fructose -- and was bottled in glass instead of plastic" Frisbee P.S. Yeah, hopelessly retro taste buds. Do they still make RC Draft? That stuff was good. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AliceTheOwl Posted August 11, 2008 Report Share Posted August 11, 2008 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Just one quote, but it's a good one. A captured villain who's pulling some strings from the inside attempts to manipulate our Teen Champions group into wiping out his major rival. Instead, we play along enough to lure his partners out of hiding, and beat them up. The villain is throwing a fit in his cell, and Singirl (ever the demon, taking glee in the suffering of her enemies), goes over to gloat. Striking Tiger and Brick stay back at the base. GM: "You're watching this on a live feed." ST: "I'm making popcorn." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BoloOfEarth Posted August 11, 2008 Report Share Posted August 11, 2008 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Last night's D&D game. I was out of town last time we played, and a friend (Rich) played my character. They had fought some giants and Rich rolled incredibly well for my character, hitting and causing great damage with almost every shot. Devlyn (OOC): "He played you better than you play you." We continue through the Zarnan Pass, mapping and exploring current conditions for our employers. Along the way, we find four giants staked to the ground, dead for days, with a dozen huge vultures picking at the bodies. The ranger goes forward to investigate. Yllek (in Prince Humperdink voice): "Someone has bested a giant..." DM: "They've been completey disemboweled, and you notice that whoever did this has taken their giblies." Ryan: "Oh, no! Rocky Mountain giant oysters." Tracks in the area reveal something(s) large, with talons, did this. Party members are getting worried about the same thing(s) attacking us. Yllek: "Hey, last time we beat *eight* giants! So we're twice as tough as whatever did this!" Leila: "I have a spell that can turn someone into a pillar of salt..." Il'Marcum: "Oooo! Can you do a pillar of pepper? Maybe a whole set of condiments?" Farther down the trail, we see a cave on the cliff face, probably where the attacker(s) came from. Yllek is pusing to investigate the cave, but nobody else is eager to do so. Leila: "If you want to go, you can come back and tell us -- in ghost form -- what's up there." Yllek (marking the cave on the map): I label it "possible rest area". OOC, discussing a dwarf NPC. Ryan: "And don't forget his six-foot mallet..." Il'Marcum: "I'm not touching that one." General comment: Ryan: "I love danger -- I'm getting married in the fall." Several days later, we spot a dragon as it's diving toward us. Since it's coming out of the sun, we don't know what kind of dragon it is. Someone mentions the possibility that it might possibly be friendly. DM: "Most dragons don't come swooping out of the sun if they're inviting you in for tea." The dragon's first flame attack does 63 points, instantly killing Leila's apprentice, a second-level druid with about 14 hit points. Yllek: "Now that we know what kind of dragon it is, I cast Resist Energy, Mass, against fire. All of you subtract 12 points from all fire damage." Leila: "Too bad you didn't cast that *last* turn on poor Chris." Yllek: "Yeah, 'cuz she would have taken 12 points less -- and still be dead." DM: "What's Sampson [Leila's huge dog companion] going to do?" Leila: "He's gonna shit his pants." Yllek: "He's a dog -- he puts on pants first so he can shit them." After the dragon attacked, it passed the party and began swooping back up into the sky. Il'Marcum cast a Ray of Frost (or some such) against the dragon, hitting for pretty good damage. A side note: red dragons are apparently vulnerable to cold attacks. Il'Marcum: "The dragon was facing the other way, so it doesn't know who did that!" DM: "Not quite. It was looking back, chortling over torching most of the party, when it suddenly went, 'Ow! My a$$!!!'" Devlyn: "But isn't cold good for hemmorhoids?" After the dragon landed, Sampson gets in a critical hit, finishing off the dragon. DM: "Sampson bit the dragon in the dangly bits." Ryan: "Hey, Il'Marcum already froze them. Did they just snap off?" DM: "It falls over dead." Aren: "It just gave up. Life wasn't worth living without its dangly bits." Some of the party members were seriously hurt, but a few evaded the fire attacks. Aren: I don't see why dragons are such a big deal. I didn't get hurt at all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enforcer84 Posted August 11, 2008 Report Share Posted August 11, 2008 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Not a quote, but.... Phoebe challenged the "King" of the Goblins to one on one combat (as A Knight is wont to do) and the King, turned out to be equally honorable, he agreed and so his goblin elites and Phoebe's fellow party members duked it out while they went mano y mano. Well sort of. For the first three rounds Phoebe nearly crit failed, crit failed, and missed. The King, missed, nearly crit failed, and crit failed. It was like Captain America and the Redskull fighting as Octogenarians. It was sad. The funny part was round four one of Phoebe's companions who'd come in late, saw that Phoebe was full of crossbow bolts (from her entrance to the room) and healed her. The poor druid shrank against the wall when both combatants glared at him and Phoebe started yelling, "Aw cripes! This is a Challenge! You can't heal me!" Then she turned to the King and put her sword tip to the ground and opened her shield arm. "One free shot to even things up?" He took it. And missed. In round 5 she finally hit and then noticed that it was healing almost immediately. Darn king turned out to be a wererat. 2nd level knight with standard (halfling) longsword not going to fare well. He transformed and our wizard tried to interfere. King Rat went after wizard and Phoebe called him "A cheating bastard". But the truth was she felt guilty about her side interfering twice, while the goblins followed their King's orders. But we won the day with a curious combination of an enlarge person cast on the King so he couldn't escape, a cleric gouging the wererat with his silver holy symbol and the curious picking up of an enchanted silver longsword (human sized) from the fallen PC's by the next in line. Good times. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Susano Posted August 11, 2008 Report Share Posted August 11, 2008 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... DM: "Not quite. It was looking back, chortling over torching most of the party, when it suddenly went, 'Ow! My a$$!!!'" Flesh Gordon's in your party? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BoloOfEarth Posted August 11, 2008 Report Share Posted August 11, 2008 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Flesh Gordon's in your party? Darn close, actually, with that particular character. When we were discussing whether or not the eviscerated giants were male or female, someone suggested Il'Marcum just walk by them, as he seems able to detect women of any race. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bubba smith Posted August 11, 2008 Report Share Posted August 11, 2008 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Last night's D&D game. I was out of town last time we played, and a friend (Rich) played my character. They had fought some giants and Rich rolled incredibly well for my character, hitting and causing great damage with almost every shot. Devlyn (OOC): "He played you better than you play you." . if he's that good maybe you should invite him to join your group Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BoloOfEarth Posted August 11, 2008 Report Share Posted August 11, 2008 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... if he's that good maybe you should invite him to join your group He's already in the group -- plays our fighter, Aren. He was just playing my character as well, while I was out of town. When the player for Leila was rolling bad, he picked up her dice and re-rolled her attacks as a joke. He would have gotten two hits, one a critical success. I suggested he roll for all of us. But the DM said no. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jkwleisemann Posted August 12, 2008 Report Share Posted August 12, 2008 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From Dark Paths: Phelar: "Shivers? A drug?" *looks down at the crate full of the stuff she's been fishing through* "Is it bad to be coated to your shoulder in it?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egyptoid Posted August 12, 2008 Report Share Posted August 12, 2008 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Marvel Galaxies, Addendum: Skrull Warrior: "I am Billy" Moloid Diplomat: "don't forget; we summon huge monsters to run our errands" Starfox lodges a complaint to High Evolutionary : "Skrulls ?!? what's up with that !?! how about some stalkers or papparazzi ?!?" and not a quote, but the Skrull pulled off hypnosis versus Hercules, which was quite a sight for a sore GM's eyes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lonewalker Posted August 13, 2008 Report Share Posted August 13, 2008 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... More stuff from our Chronicles of the Agency Pulps Champions campaign! Enjoy! ------ As the GM sets up and explains the battle situation before combat begins... GM: These guys are about twenty feet up...these are ten feet up...and these guys are on your level. Rocket Ranger (OOC): No one is on our level! Patriot (OOC): Ooo...trash talk! GM: Yeah, they'd have to be quite a bit lower... Patriot (OOC): Ooo...trash talk! As the battle with armed Nazis and spear-wielding Reptilemen begins, the Heroes quickly discuss how to reach their foes with all haste... Mighty Huntress: I'd be just fine if you just tossed me right into the middle of the fray! Clubber: That's because you haven't been shot yet... Clubber has been trying to reach the lead Nazi at the rear of the battle but his way is blocked by Reptilian warriors... GM: Okay, you have two lizardmen engaged with you. What you do want to do? Clubber (OOC): Fortunately, I know something he doesn't know. GM: What's that? Clubber (OOC): I have a 9" leap. Flying overhead, Rocket Ranger notes the progress of Patriot's section of teh battlefield... Rocket Ranger: Geez, Patriot, you have a whole pile of unconscious guys over here. Patriot: I thought I'd keep them all in one place because...we have to keep American beautiful! Don't litter! In typical Clubber improvised weapon fashion... Clubber: I don't need a sword - I have a Nazi! Trying to explain the lousy hit and damage rolls against the Reptilemen... Rocket Ranger: But they remind me of a pet 'gator I had as a kid! Caught in a fury, Mighty Huntress leaps upon the Reptileman that injured her... Mighty Huntress (OOC): I pounce on the lizardman and bite his face off! Clubber (OOC): Nom-nom-nom! Mighty Huntress (OOC): Yur lizardman haz a flavr! Darn those Psych Lims! Patriot (OOC): Use your Flamethrower on those Nazis! Rocket Ranger (OOC): I have a Code Against Killing...I can't use an RKA on the Nazi. Patriot (OOC): He's a Nazi! He doesn't count. Rocket Ranger (OOC): He has to count. If he doesn't, we're just as bad as they are. Patriot (OOC): Damn it! Upon discovering that the Nazi commander is the Skull, one of the Ubermenschen the Heroes battled earlier... Rocket Ranger: Didn't we leave this guy beat up upstairs? GM: Not that beat up. Patriot: Ooo...we'll have to change that! Clubber's idea of "questioning" the prisoner... Clubber: Maybe Rocket Ranger can wire his Electro Grip to the "Wedding Vegetables." The Heroes find a sealed doorway into the Cobra Temple... Rocket Ranger: Havoc, can we borrow you for some trap-finding work? Havoc: Don't we still have captured Nazis downstairs that we can use for that? As the Heroes try to figure out how to light up the darkness within the Temple... Clubber: Didn't the Boy Scouts teach you anything about flint and steel? Havoc: They wouldn't let me in. Patriot: But she knows a lot about selling cookies. As Havoc searches the strange rooms within the Temple... Havoc: Hey, guys, I found an....I don't know what. Patriot: Oh, that boils it down. ------ Lonewalker Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Major Tom Posted August 13, 2008 Report Share Posted August 13, 2008 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Originally posted by Lonewalker: Caught in a fury, Mighty Huntress leaps upon the Reptileman that injured her... Mighty Huntress (OOC): I pounce on the lizardman and bite his face off! Clubber (OOC): Nom-nom-nom! Mighty Huntress (OOC): Yur lizardman haz a flavr! Lizardman Tartare... what a disgusting thought. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Clubber's idea of "questioning" the prisoner... Clubber: Maybe Rocket Ranger can wire his Electro Grip to the "Wedding Vegetables". Aside from the fact that it was a shocking suggestion on Clubber's part, did RR ask if he should fry or sautee the items in question? BTW, I PMed you last week with a question, and I was wondering if you got it? Major Tom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egyptoid Posted August 16, 2008 Report Share Posted August 16, 2008 MARVEL GALAXIES - Week 6 High Evolutionary wondered how Radioactive Man could still be alive after all these years, to which RM replied "I have a half-life of several million years" Kisa AQM gets an email from the Collector, and so Hi Evo, who built the base and all its systems, is totally flabbergasted by this, and starts ranting: "He doesn't even live in this Galaxy !?!" "We just rebuilt the internet last month !?!" "How the heck does he know who she is !?!" "How did he know where to send the freakin message !?!" "How the heck did he get through my spam filters !?! " this set off a tide of laughter and OOC discussion as to how do you filter out messages from an Elder of the Universe, how powerful do you have to be to ignore an Elder's messages, what vast cosmic powers can they marshall to blow through your firewall, etc. etc. Starfox has a radio show where he encourages the remaining (only 975 million estimated) citizens of earth, to rebuild and reorganize. well now he's written a book: "Ten Steps to a New Earth" and he pushes it on everyone he meets. When asked what hs vast plan was he starts his spiel: "Step One, have a positive attitude..." the Katana Girls showed up this week, and some of them carry cell-phones, but mostly they don't work on post-apocalypse Earth. There's no service, the cell towers were all eaten by Nano-Bots years ago. However, during the big fight, one of them started ringing ... well it turns out Radioactive Man had just suffered knockback, ending up right next to her. "Sorry" he says. not a quote, but another fun moment: most of Kisa's energy powers all manifest in animal shapes, and the hedgehog is slow but powerful prickly, and it took him 8 phases to do it, but he crawled into the jet intake of the enemy troop transport, blowing the wing to smithereens. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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