Rick R Mortis Posted April 18, 2005 Report Share Posted April 18, 2005 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... The fantasy party's co-leader to the rookie mage on his first adventure... "That's very impressive, Chryss. Dropping a giant in one shot is very, very good. But next time, lets actually see if thy're hostile beofre we open fire." And that's when the Giant's big dragon buddy shows up and asks to know what's going on. Samuraiko 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arandmoor_Keet Posted April 19, 2005 Report Share Posted April 19, 2005 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Sigh...not hero (sob) but funny none the less. We're playing in an Eberon game. I'm behind the reigns of a bossy human Artificer of house Cannith (Adam), and my friend is playing my Warforged Bodyguard (Hammer). Story behind the two is that I built him before the end of the war and we then served untill it ended. Quotes: Hammer: "...then you can bind an air elemental to me, and I could fly!" Adam: "No! No flight!" Hammer: "Why not?" Adam: "Because first you'll want wings! Then you'll want BLADES ON THEM!" ------------------ Adam: "Uh oh. Iron Defenders." Hammer: "Ooh...DOGGIES! I WANT A DOGGIE!" Adam: "No Hammer. No dogs. Umm...hows this. You go first and destroy them, and I'll stay here." Hammer: "No. I want a doggie!" Adam: "What? No dogs Hammer. Now destroy them so we can search the room and get out of here." Hammer: "No. I want one of THOSE doggies!" Adam: "Hammer. Axe. Doggies. Now. I'll make you one later." ------------------ Sinister Man: "I have heard tales of your group's exploits and know of your reputation to be both effective and discreet." Hammer: "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...(continues for a while)" Adam: "Do you want me to help you find these 'discreet' guys you keep going on about because there's no way in HELL you can be talking about us." Hammer: "(still laughing)" Adam: "Maybe you're talking about my cousin? Alvin duCannith? He's kind of discreet...well...compared to us at least..." Sinister Man: "No, I'm positive it's you." Hammer: "(still laughing)" ----------------------- Little explaniation about this one. We were on an airship looking for a vampire that was on-board and were in our cabin discussing tactics. Adam: "Okay, when we find him, what do we do with the captin demanding we stay in our cabbin like that?" Hammer: "I want to ride the vampire all the way to the ground! It would make one hell of a crater, AND he'd be turned into goo!" Adam: "Umm...Hammer, I didn't build you to survive that kind of a fall..." Hamer: "Yeah, but THINK of the crater we'd make!" Ugh...the thing's I put up with... death tribble and Samuraiko 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
csyphrett Posted April 19, 2005 Report Share Posted April 19, 2005 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From my HU game: GM: Alex, you're floating in orbit above the earth, Gecko has been knocked into the atmosphere, Miklos has left the system to pick up his other pound of gold. Vash, you're just dead. CES Samuraiko 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egyptoid Posted April 19, 2005 Report Share Posted April 19, 2005 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... In our Champions game Blue Bat has had nothing but bad luck with his Bata-Rangs. Every time he's used them he's either missed, fumbled an 18, or just totally bounced them off nothing. The GM usually described the missed shot (the Bata-Rangs are supposed to return to him) as being stuck point-first into a nearby wall. One teammate tried to be helpful: Blue-Bat rolls an 18 again. Batarang goes zang into wall over villains head. My character points at it, attempts a PRE attack with it by exclaiming "My gosh, I cant believe he's using a Bat-Bomb! Run!!" GM says no way, its not ticking. PRE attack fails. Other teammate just makes fun of Blue-Bat: Bata-Rangs? I thought they were climbing tools. (cause they stick in walls like little shelves) Samuraiko 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teh bunneh Posted April 25, 2005 Report Share Posted April 25, 2005 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From my regular Champions game: Straight Arrow: I have no prejudices against anyone. Tank: Even the Dutch? Straight Arrow: Not at all. I find their tiny wooden shoes quite charming. Bill. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kirby Posted April 25, 2005 Report Share Posted April 25, 2005 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Sunday's D&D: The party (human, dwarf & 2 elves) walk into a inn [yeah, there's got to be a joke here somewhere] to start off their investigation of why the town's populace is declining and the attitudes are no longer friendly. A round of drinks are ordered for the group at their table. The dwarf walks up to the bartender at the bar. Dwarf: I'm going to buy the beer a drink. Bartender: Would you like one for yourself as well? The food for the players is drugged and it affects one elf and the other elf's wolf. The second elf can tell something is wrong, but isn't affected; she plays along as being drugged. When it's just the dwarf and the human, the people in the bar try to subdue them, but fail. A big fight takes place, one subduer dies, three get away and three are beaten. The human is fine, but the dwarf is down to 3 hp. After interrogating the survivors, the party decides to go to the temple to investigage further, but needs to leave one person behind to watch the prisoners. Dwarf: (Paraphrasing) I don't want to go, I'm down to 3hp, I'll die. GM (me): I'm going to tell you this just one time. You are the priest. You have healing skills and healing spells. Elf: Weren't you just bragging about you being the only priest in the group half an hour ago? Dwarf: Oh yeah. GM: Now... (goes on to "remind" him how to use his healing skill & his healing spells.). Later, most of the party (sans dwarf) is at the temple trying to see if they can get some answers there. One of the elves gets bored and starts doing handstands. Priestess: Please don't do those in here. Elf: Very well. (Goes outside to the lawn. Sees a caretaker and starts doing handstands.) I like doing acrobats. Other player: Whore. death tribble 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karmakaze Posted April 26, 2005 Report Share Posted April 26, 2005 Crime Doesn't Pay This is an old one, actually, but I'm new to the boards... We were fighting a supervillain who turned out to have been my characters Economics professor before he mutated. In the middle of combat, I hit him with "OH, yeah? Well, if you're so good at economics, how come you don't know Crime Doesn't PAY!!?" Samuraiko and Susano 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enforcer84 Posted April 26, 2005 Report Share Posted April 26, 2005 Re: Crime Doesn't Pay Running joke. We started a dungeon crawl recently. My character, an elf mage told the other party members that he was going to make his name on this dungeon. That he would make it his own. So they wrote up a "Deed" for him. We find a secret door, follow a rough hewen, narrow passage to a room with a wooden throne and an advanced Ghast. He cackles and tells us how glad he is to finally have "visitors" after so long. Althian (My mage): Okay this room will not do for a throne room. *Turns to dwarven mage* Get your people on widening that hallway at the very least. Than0s and Samuraiko 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Koshka Posted April 26, 2005 Report Share Posted April 26, 2005 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... In last night's D&D game, we were trying to solve a murder mystery. Not that we have any real ability at this, but since one PC's boyfriend was framed for the murder we've got a certain amount of incentive. The party's ranger just took a level of some prestige class that's giving her a wolf's sense of smell, so she was sniffing around the murder scene to see how many people were there. She made her roll well enough to get a rundown from the GM, then the player asked about checking the scents of everyone else in the house. The GM pointed out that not only would the ranger have to get very close to those people to check their scents, but that the best places to check for scents would be armpits and crotch/rears. The ranger's player then asked the druid if she would change shape into a wolf and check the scents herself. The druid's player immediately stated "I don't want to sniff your butts, and you're my friends." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kirby Posted April 27, 2005 Report Share Posted April 27, 2005 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... I can't believe I forgot this one (same Sunday gaming group as above)! When the PCs enter the inn, everyone is subdued and no one present is talking. The PCs sit at the open table. (This inn has been subverted by the bad guys.) A person comes out saying he's the bartender and asks the PCs what they're in town for, along with getting drinks. Elf (who has the wolf): We're looking for an unnamed evil that's taking over your town. (This led to the party being drugged and attacked as mentioned above.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrosshairCollie Posted April 27, 2005 Report Share Posted April 27, 2005 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Elf (who has the wolf): We're looking for an unnamed evil that's taking over your town. Thank you, Captain Subtlety! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kirby Posted April 28, 2005 Report Share Posted April 28, 2005 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Thank you' date=' Captain Subtlety![/quote'] Yeah. She's actually the 2nd best role-player of the group. The other two (dwarf and elf who loved doing acrobats) are not quite up to par, though the girl that plays the other elf does try. (Cpt. Subtlety is playing a ranger who isn't too city-oriented [even though this is merely a small village]; she's trying to find her personality, at least.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hooligan x Posted April 29, 2005 Report Share Posted April 29, 2005 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... "I'm the best at what I do and what I do isn't very interesting" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enforcer84 Posted April 29, 2005 Report Share Posted April 29, 2005 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... So we're trying to force open a sarcofagus, why? W're dumb. But anyway. The Burly fighters are not making their STR checks. Gerbo the peasant warrrior(Str 18): Grunt...no go Gerbo aids burley Dwarf (Str 17): Grunt...NOPE (rolled a 1, tore a ligament in his shoulder) Gerbo, and Dwarf aid Thief (STR 14): Gaaaahah! Finally, my mage...STR 8 mind you...: "okay could someone take my backpack I can hardly move with that..." Now with four of us "IT WORKED!" Elf to sheepish fighters: "Maybe if you two had bee pushing from the same side..." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fuzzy Gnome Posted April 29, 2005 Report Share Posted April 29, 2005 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Last Saturday, our party had just literally been through Hell and come out in Shangri-La. We found ourselves in a Buddhist monastery. For some inane gnomish reason, I thought the monks should have loud red-orange robes, but the GM described them as dull brownish orange. Windows 3000 Sux Man (me): Brown? What's the matter with scarlet? Quantum: I don't know, and frankly I don't give a damn. Samuraiko, death tribble and Koshka 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue Posted April 30, 2005 Report Share Posted April 30, 2005 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... This from the current game in progress right now... "If you can teach a bear to ride a unicycle, you can teach a monkey to wield a flaming sword" teh bunneh 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Powerhouse Posted May 1, 2005 Report Share Posted May 1, 2005 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Modifying an storyline from a Silver Knight fanfic with some characters and situation moved around: The scenario revolves around two super teams: the Silver Knights and the Claw (super team arm of FIST, ie a VIPER analogue). Nova of the Silver Knights had fallen in love with the secret ID of one of the Claw's members: Lasher. When she found out she went livid and nearly killed him but the two made up when she realized how deeply he felt about her. A secret affair went on for over a year even as the two teams clashed repeatedly. Finally, one of FIST's major commanders Deathstorm (and heavy weight super) launched a scheme to blackmail the world through a nuclear strike. With the gloves off, the Silver Knights strike only to be defeated. When the deadline passes, Deathstorm decides to launch. Lasher decides to side with the Knights and frees them. In the battle, it's found out that Deathstorm's armor will send the final command and he needs to be taken out to stop the missiles from exploding. DS is pretty much unstoppable and scatters the team to the winds. Just before he can kill Nova, Lasher attacks Deathstorm with a lethal strike only to be mortally wounded. In a huge explosion, DS and his armor are destroyed and the world is saved. As Lasher is dying, Nova cradles the man in her arms and both are crying as they are overcome with grief. He starts to lament that he was so selfish and only cared about himself. "Sssshh.." Nova whispered as she stroked his burned face. "Don't talk like that my love. You're a hero, you saved the whole world." A shaking hand coated with blood reached up to caressed Nova's cheek while a smile touched his lips despite the pain and tears. "I just wanted to save *you*." Than0s, Captain Obvious, gewing and 4 others 6 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nechevo Posted May 1, 2005 Report Share Posted May 1, 2005 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... "Sssshh.." Nova whispered as she stroked his burned face. "Don't talk like that my love. You're a hero, you saved the whole world." A shaking hand coated with blood reached up to caressed Nova's cheek while a smile touched his lips despite the pain and tears. "I just wanted to save *you*." Ok that was a really good line... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shaunclinton Posted May 1, 2005 Report Share Posted May 1, 2005 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Towards the end of a Fantasy scenario where the players have been facing off against the undead minions of a Liche, all the time being forced back, until eventually they rally some troops and decide to make a final stand. They manage to repulse the enemy attack and so the Liche himself make his entrance to finish off these meddlesome foes... GM (Me): "As the thundering of hooves comes closer through the cold mist a stillness hangs across the field of battle for a moment... then suddenly a twisted chariot of fused bone drawn by skeletal horses bursts forth through the veil, the charioteer is a dread figure, skeletal and rotting, like a zombie with burning eyes dressed in dark robes covered in arcane symbols and weilding a black blade that drips with foul ichor." Steve: (with genuine shock on his face) "What? Who killed him!?!?" We later found out he thought a Liche was just a good necromancer! TaxiMan 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Powerhouse Posted May 2, 2005 Report Share Posted May 2, 2005 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Quote: Originally Posted by Powerhouse "Sssshh.." Nova whispered as she stroked his burned face. "Don't talk like that my love. You're a hero, you saved the whole world." A shaking hand coated with blood reached up to caressed Nova's cheek while a smile touched his lips despite the pain and tears. "I just wanted to save *you*." "Ok that was a really good line..." Thanks. *blush* It's one of my favorites. I know it's melodramatic but that's my writing style and I'm glad you liked it. TaxiMan 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Powerhouse Posted May 2, 2005 Report Share Posted May 2, 2005 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From another fanfic: Here, Lady Silver is the world's archmage and facing her worst crisis: A powerful demonlord has managed to capture the soul of Tyrannon and with such power has ripped open portals between Earth and his hellish dimension. Most supers have already been badly injured or captured, with only Lady Silver and a rag-tag team of the remaining Silver Knights, Wards (a team of mystics), and a few other battered defenders left. Through the mystic mirror, images assaulted the heroes: the populace is panic, man's armies devastated, innocents screaming as their still beating hearts are ripped from their chest and a sky dark as the wings of a million demons block out the sun. A pall descended upon the room as their hearts shrank from the enormity of the task and hope fled. Mandrake, his tailored suit now in tatters, voiced what they were all thinking: "what do we do now?" With purpose, Lady Silver turned from the mirror. Her eyes hard and devoid of their normal compassion, she fixed the others with a look of grim determination. "We win." Apologies for the terrible writing. I'm making this up as I go along. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. MID-Nite Posted May 2, 2005 Report Share Posted May 2, 2005 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From my Champions game, The Outsiders are facing down Black Paladin and his new girlfriend. The following exchange takes place.... Black Paladin(Me): " It has come too far to be thwarted by you knights of this new age now. I will not be stopped...not this time. " Surgical Steel(Player): " Oh.....all our villains say that.....and where are they now? " Black Paladin(Me): " At large? " Samuraiko and death tribble 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted May 2, 2005 Report Share Posted May 2, 2005 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Backstory: at the game I run, the team Mentalist, Foxfire, is Hunted by PSI and Stalked by Menton (She's a mentalist with 20 com, he wants her to be his wife-without him taking over her mind.) 2 sessions ago, The team had a run in with part of PSI. Mindslayer and Torment were cptured. (A mentalist and an Android on the team helps) At the end of last session, the Mnetalist got home to find a message from the Psyciatric Ward the two were being held at. (The mentalist thought the two had been brainwashed. So they had been put there, not prison) The message said that they had been released and the charges dropped, JUST LIKE SHE ASKED. (she hadn't) Foxfire called the police and asked if they had ordered the release. They hadn't. As she is explaining what is happening to the Sgt. on the phone, Mindslayer turns herself in. She doesn't know WHY she has to turn her self in, but she knows she has commited these crimes and should be arrested. An envelope is dropped thru Foxfire's mail slot. SHE CALLS The Entire Team OVer, before she opens the letter. Letter: My Dear, Anything that puts a crimp in PSI's plans s more than welcome by me. So I thought I would help you out. Alejandro Meddinni (I'm going by memory so it is spelled wrong) Player: (looks at me) I Hate You! Samuraiko 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drewbicus Posted May 4, 2005 Report Share Posted May 4, 2005 Some Recent Winners From My Group Good cop, PSYCHO cop The players have stopped a hit raid against a particular mafioso named Jimmy the Shark. They have Jimmy and are questioning him to find out who might have sent the hit team. The two heroes are a scrapper type and a pistolero type (who is on his first mission with this super team). The conversation goes like this, in what should have been a "Good Cop/Bad Cop" play: Scrapper: Tell us what we want to know! Jimmy the Shark: No Pistolero: Can I shoot him? Scrapper (obviously thinking this is a ploy): Sure. Pistolero: OK. *shoots Jimmy in the head* zornwil, Samuraiko and Magmarock 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hooligan x Posted May 4, 2005 Report Share Posted May 4, 2005 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From our current Champs campaign: We had a player obsessed with Castlevania. He was playing the next-to-last Belmont. Due to years of inbreeding, the Belmonts were none too bright. Fortunately, all the vampires had been killed generations ago. Vincent Belmont had joined the group after quitting his Starbucks job. After a marginally successful mission, he decided to treat the group to dinner at his favorite resturant, The Golden Duck (a medieval theme resturant.) As the night progressed, Vincent became drunker and more embarassing. Finally, they pick him off the floor and appologize to the waitress, who says: "'tis expected. I have worked here but a fortnight, and thrice hath he chundered." For some reason, this is our most quoted line OOG. Mostly at Rudy's on Elm St. After Terror has had her 8 Magnars. Samuraiko 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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