input.jack Posted June 25, 2007 Report Share Posted June 25, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Some silliness from the Victorian Adventurers game: GM: Last session, there was an examination of the print shoppe, which led to the sewer expedition where you fought the horrible, alchemically-mutated rats. Afterwards people burned, or bought new clothes... Szophia (OOC): Why would be burn new clothes? GM: >_< ------------ Major Ambrose (OOC): Oh no! With Lord Kensington's Player out, that means that Im the ONLY Brit PC. I, and I ALONE, must uphold the Status Quo! ------------ Szophia: If you would care to explain out findings? Wild Lilly (OOC): [ChrisTucker] Aint NOBODY can explain our findings! [/ChrisTucker] ------------ Amaravati: Im in a hospital. Ill be fine. ------------- Black Reg (Crime Lord): So, I asked myself yesterday...what are a Hungarian Princess, a Lord of the Realm, a British Army Officer, a bendy Hindi, and an American gunfighter doing all running about together in MY town? Amaravati: Ive heard this joke before. :/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drhoz Posted June 25, 2007 Report Share Posted June 25, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From my Kingdom City game last night: After a rather tawdry scene between 3, Vitas and Void: The Gunny (OOC): "Let's try and get the level back up to the gutter." ViTUSSSS!!!!!!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AliceTheOwl Posted June 25, 2007 Report Share Posted June 25, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... As the character of Rastal (the unintentionally humorous Knight) goes about town on some errands, the other players discuss his results: Flora (OOC): "Rastal isn't the sharpest tool in the shed." Daris (OOC): "Rastal's the HAMMER." Later, remarking on the value of thinking ahead, Flora's player remarks, "I'm glad there's an edurance potion in my cleavage." Discussing plans about what to do about overwhelming odds against them, Flora says, "We need to run away." Rastal replies, "I don't RUN away. I walk." The archenemy has been, oddly, keeping to himself during their fight, so Rastal asks him if he'll intervene if Rastal stops his underling. The archenemy shakes his head, bidding Rastal to kill him, if he can. OOC, Flora says, "Don't do it, Rastal! Don't go over to the dark side!" Later, on a "caught die" STUN multiplier (I rolled a 6, the fifth time in a row an enemy had won big on the stun lottery, and it would've taken his character into GM's option), I re-rolled, getting a 3 this time. Josh chided me about "cheating," saying his character would take the original damage. I retorted, "Don't talk me out of cheating in your favor, dangit!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BoloOfEarth Posted June 25, 2007 Report Share Posted June 25, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From last night's D&D game: Susan, who plays Devlyn (our sneaky rogue) is still driving back from up north when everybody else had already arrived. The DM decided to get started anyway and then we'd bring her up to speed. Il'Marcum: So, I guess we're without our rogue for a bit. Yllek: No, she's just made the best darn Hide roll ever! We've been chasing after two people on horseback, accompanied by a bunch of giants, and from all indications they are not stopping at all, even for the night. DM: On the third day, you find the remains of two horses. They look like all the life essence has been sucked out of them. Aren: They might be undead. Ryan, anything from your sword? Ryan: (draws his undead-bane sword) Nope. Aren: Maybe you should stab them, just in case. Ryan: Okay, I attack them. DM: Let me get this straight. You're actually going to beat a dead horse? Leila, our druid, changed into a bird form and flew ahead to scout. DM: You see 8-12 giant creatures in the distance. Something on them is glinting in the sunlight. Leila: Glinting? What's that from? Yllek: (OOC, mimes somebody looking through a spyglass) Yep, she's almost within range... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jkwleisemann Posted June 25, 2007 Report Share Posted June 25, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... DM: On the third day, you find the remains of two horses. They look like all the life essence has been sucked out of them. Aren: They might be undead. Ryan, anything from your sword? Ryan: (draws his undead-bane sword) Nope. Aren: Maybe you should stab them, just in case. Ryan: Okay, I attack them. DM: Let me get this straight. You're actually going to beat a dead horse? Besides... who'd worry about a vampiric horse? What's it going to do - bite the necks of all your sugar cubes? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteveZilla Posted June 25, 2007 Report Share Posted June 25, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... DM: On the third day, you find the remains of two horses. They look like all the life essence has been sucked out of them. Aren: They might be undead. Ryan, anything from your sword? Ryan: (draws his undead-bane sword) Nope. Aren: Maybe you should stab them, just in case. Ryan: Okay, I attack them. DM: Let me get this straight. You're actually going to beat a dead horse? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Obvious Posted June 25, 2007 Report Share Posted June 25, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... It's funny on two levels... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
"V" Posted June 25, 2007 Report Share Posted June 25, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From my Amber campaign: "I'm going to be out in Shadow for a while. Uncle Blaine has been thrown into jail and I want to visit him." "Those poor jailers." "Exactly. Plus his truck has been arrested on suspicion of witchcraft." (stunned silence) "Call us when you get back." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Haven Walkur Posted June 26, 2007 Report Share Posted June 26, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Ah! Oh! An Amber game...V, I want to play with you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sundog Posted June 26, 2007 Report Share Posted June 26, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Even assuming it needs rescuing, why would you want to rescue it?? Lucius Alexander Inquiring palindromedaries aren't sure they want to know.... Because Mechanon's base and resources have been taken over by an extra-dimensional artificial intelligence. The AI doesn't want to exerminate all flesh - just all supers - but it's frighteningly more efficient than Mechanon... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drhoz Posted June 26, 2007 Report Share Posted June 26, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Because Mechanon's base and resources have been taken over by an extra-dimensional artificial intelligence. The AI doesn't want to exerminate all flesh - just all supers - but it's frighteningly more efficient than Mechanon... little things like using Mechanon's robots to harvest the local flesh (ie, villagers, soldiers sent to investigate, etc) for resources, and thinking that psychotic alien racial-supremicists, and Yog-Sothoth's daddy will make perfectly acceptable assistants, are also reasons for concern Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
"V" Posted June 26, 2007 Report Share Posted June 26, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... More from my Amber campaign, following on from the last session. "How's Uncle Blaine?" "Not good. They're going to burn him at the stake tomorrow." "My God, that's dreadful!" "I know, he'll be furious." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
input.jack Posted June 27, 2007 Report Share Posted June 27, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Monster Hunter: Theyre like Vampires. Only they dont feed on blood. They feed on emotions. Feline Fury: What kind of emotions? Monster Hunter: The kind you get a lot of in Los Angeles. Feline Fury: Arrogance? Or desperation to get your screenplay read? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teh bunneh Posted June 27, 2007 Report Share Posted June 27, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Castilla, the party's red-skinned half-demon girl, goes into a typical "Wretched Hive of Scum and Villainy" to get a drink. She's accosted by a drunk. Drunk: Hey lil thing, how 'bout you spend some time with me? Castilla: Get away from me or I will hurt you. Drunk: Ooh, she's got a sting! She's like a little red wasp! Castilla: That's right, and I will sting you if you don't back off. Drunk: It might be worth it, 'cause you can find the sweetest honey in a wasp nest. Castilla: Other Player (OOC): For god's sake, take him out of the gene pool! Quickly! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NestorDRod Posted June 27, 2007 Report Share Posted June 27, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... This one is one of those "you had to be there" quotes, but it did make me laugh. The set-up: I'm GM'ing a 30's pulp Lost World where our heroes are engaged in a three-way fight with Nazi soliers and angry apemen. Prof. Munroe is somewhat put out by the fact that Nick Hall, the rugged explorer, is so much better at shooting the soldiers than him (the professor has no experience using guns). Me: So, what do you want to do? Munroe: Well, what do I have to shoot at myself? Me: I know you're exasperated, but why would you want to shoot yourself? The look on the player's face as he worked out what he'd just said was the clincher. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shoutybloke Posted June 29, 2007 Report Share Posted June 29, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... "Noodles solve all your problems" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bloodstone Posted June 29, 2007 Report Share Posted June 29, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... God damn, Hogwarts is a frickin' homo farm! * * * * * Nobody want's to talk to the lesbians because they can't make food. * * * * * Where's the penis guy? * * * * * I want to get implants too... * * * * * Father Martin: On the way down to the bar I stop at the armory * * * * * GM: A man in a cloak walks into the bar and sits down by the fire... Father Martin: I shoot him! I put four right into him. BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! EAT THAT PLOT HOOK! * * * * * Torchsong: Ok, now that I've had a couple of drinks I want to learn how to shoot the gun. * * * * * Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaxom Posted June 29, 2007 Report Share Posted June 29, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... GM: A man in a cloak walks into the bar and sits down by the fire... Father Martin: I shoot him! I put four right into him. BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! EAT THAT PLOT HOOK! Oh man, I have *so* been there. (You must spread some blah, blah, blah.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Balabanto Posted June 29, 2007 Report Share Posted June 29, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Superconductor: You know, Mervin, it's amazing how you can think you're sneaking up on me, and in reality, you're going to die. No matter what you do, you'll always be a loser. ------------------------------------ Superconductor: I'm going to kill your father, Sarah. Because he took my parents away from me. I'm going to make my father proud of me. Saiphe: Excuse me, but aren't you taking this whole in-laws thing a little bit too far? ------------------ Seizure: NO! Don't take me through that portal! Prestige: In case you haven't noticed, there are ten THOUSAND moss monsters here! It's regroup time! ------------------- Earlier in the game, The Night called Partacel, one of the most powerful heroes in the world, a cockbite under her breath. The Night: I can only glide, I need some altitude. Partacel: I can throw you up there. Get ready. (Hurls her 21" skyward with his current STR of 65) (Radios the Night: Not bad for a cockbite.) --------------------------------------- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
input.jack Posted June 30, 2007 Report Share Posted June 30, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... What did the Princess start singing at the royal Reception? "Dont you wish your wench was hot like me!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AliceTheOwl Posted July 2, 2007 Report Share Posted July 2, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... The PCs had a brush with holiness this game . . . Flora (to Daris): "It's weird to see you walking down the street with god." Rastal: "Sounds like the start of a joke." Daris: "What, weirder than waking up one morning, and you've suddenly given birth?" Rastal (about the aforementioned god): "I bet he can dig that trench for us!" Flora, reassuring Rastal: "I gave birth. Believe me; I gave birth." Daris, advising his party members to stop blabbering their plans all over creation: "We're in the middle of an inn; we talked about the Big A." About an NPC, contrasted with a PC's recent strikeout with an NPC, Rastal says, "Salem's very smooth. He's son-of-god smooth." Regarding hiding out her son from the Big Bad, Flora says, "He won't live there forever. We just need to . . ." She pauses, with a mournful sob, and continues, "stop Aciarren. Okay, he might live there forever." As Daris is attempting to patch things up with the female NPC, and struggling thanks to OOC remarks, he says, OOC, "Yay for the peanut gallery." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Comic Posted July 2, 2007 Report Share Posted July 2, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From a very, very long time ago. Scarlet Spectre is in his bubble-headed powersuit, desolid, Finding Weakness on Ogre. Makes A PRE attack (which fails, naturally, but it's part of his Psych. Lim. 'Impressed with Suit's Abilities') Scar: "Give up, Green Man! I am invulnerable! You cannot hurt me!" Ogre (haymakering for all he's worth on a desolid target): "Uhnf! Why puny Red Man all fuzzy!" (shouting) Scar: "Because I have a headache. Please whisper." Ogre (rolls 17 on an Int. check): "Okay. Me understand. Sorry." Whispering. Swings his fists again at the desolid powersuit. Scar: (3 levels of Find Weakness vs Ogre): "Be ironic if I punch through his chest and pull out Mike Meyers." Adept: "Be funnier if it were Cameron Diaz." Scar: "Always wanted to meet a Hollywood starlet." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlackCobra Posted July 2, 2007 Report Share Posted July 2, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Fantasy setting. (Current game system is Ye Olde Rolemaster; please hold your boos until the end.) We know that there is a very large Bad Guy organization out there that we're here to stop. So, after our first fight trying to rescue some people from local hoodlums (ok, harpies and minotaurs), we find these cute little amulets on the bad guys. Our magic runes expert decides that they're a form of communication device, except that what's spoken by one wearer of an amulet is heard by all others who have one. Or as one player put it "World Wide Evil Net"! --- Same campaign. The GM did something very interesting going from chapter to chapter. We reached the Climactic Ending (chapter 1), and the Creator of Worlds stopped by. Apparently our characters live in a multiverse, and he (yes, in this instance, the Creator was a he) was having troubles in a few of his other universes. If we signed on, he'd translate us into one of those other universes. (In meta-game terms, our GM said, pick a game system.) Same character personalities, in new bodies and somewhat new professions. So our mage is talking to a big bad NPC (a cyclops), negotiating his "surrender", shortly after our arrival in the new universe. Galen (formerly elf, now human mage): Oh, come on, you think we were--- Aramil (still an elf, monk, me): OMIGOD, we were born yesterday! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
input.jack Posted July 2, 2007 Report Share Posted July 2, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From the Sequoia City Slayer game: Teddi the Slayer (from the UK) Jinx the young Witch Charles the Teenage Templar --------- Teddi *holds up a leather thong with a silver hoop as an "amulet"*: They were wearing these. I think its their "holy symbol". Jinx: A circle?? Charles: Hmm....maybe they worship emptiness, or the void...? Teddi: So, to them, nothing's sacred ----------- [Teddi and Jinx sneak up on a spooky mansion that is a death-cult's "hideout"] Jinx *looks around*: ....Dont drink the kool-aid. ----------- Cultist: Would you like some refreshments? Jinx *snickers* ------------- Jinx: The Cult of the Cycle, huh? Worshipping the "cycle of life". Hey, didnt Elton John write a song for them a while back? Teddi: Hmm...that would be a good way to recruit people while theyre young and impressionable. Desmond, notify the Watcher's Council, and have them initiate an investigation into Elton John Jinx: I WAS KIDDING! ------------ Teddi: Never trust a Holy Sword you got on E-Bay. ------------ Teddi: Charles, do you by chance have access to a Holy Weapon? Charles: My Dad has it. And he's in South America right now. Jinx: Besides, he wont let Charles borrow it till he turns 18. His Dads totally obsessed with that sword. Polishes it with a diaper. Loves it more than he does Charles. He told him so in a birthday card once! Charles: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted July 3, 2007 Report Share Posted July 3, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... ------------ Teddi: Never trust a Holy Sword you got on E-Bay. ------------ This sounds like something out of the Dresden novels Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.